Disclaimer: This is a cross between JLA (Season 5) and Rorscharch’s Blot’s Make A Wish Story. Harry Potter is owned by JK Rowling and various publishers. Henchgirl, The Professor, and other such objects are Rorscharch’s creation. DC Comics own the Justice League and associated characters/plot devices. The lack of plot, however, can be attributed to me.
Black is Back
Clark looked up as the object of his vigil groaned and shifted. A quick glance showed that the recumbent Death Incarnate wasn’t waking—he was apparently just suffering from another nightmare. Clearly, whatever compound Pamela Isley had used was simply insufficient as a long-term remedy.
Not that such a situation was all that much of a surprise.
Still, something needed to be done and soon. Seeing that the others had yet to return from the commissary, the Man of Steel picked up the zippo left lying on the table. Clark had closely watched both Tim and his adopted father, and had already learned how the item worked. Before he lost his nerve, the Kryptonian lit the fire and paused, suddenly unsure to whom he should address his call. Tim had mentioned that he had spoken with his and Raven’s aunt, so…
“Mr. Black’s sister?” Clark tentatively requested into the fire, half-expecting it not to work.
The flame flickered. For a few moments, nothing happened aside from the shade of green of the flames changing. He was about to admit his defeat when the flame flickered again.
“Yes?” a female voice queried before a second asked, “Who is it?”
Clark blinked at the extra participant. “Uh, I was trying to reach Mr. Black’s sister?”
“Yep, that’s us. You must have been redirected. I just knew that feature will prove itself useful sooner of later. So who is it?”
“Superman,” he answered automatically, before immediately questioning himself if he should have given his alias to these unknown… beings. They didn’t seem to care, though.
“Has something else happened?” one of the women asked anxiously. “Not that I don’t like a good chat once in a while but, given the situation, I doubt this is a social call.”
“Unfortunately, you are correct,” the Kryptonian admitted. “Mr. Black is having, uh, nightmares again. It seems that the concoction Pois… Pamela Isley used is wearing off.”
“Of course it is. While floral-based compounds react faster than conventional substances, the dissolution factor…” One of the women launched into explanation.
“Is now really the best time for that?” the other female interrupted.
“You’re right. I’m sending his enhanced Dreamless Sleep Potion. It should do a better job of keeping our brother sedated,” the woman promised. “Be sure that no one else consumes the potion by mistake,” she warned. “That formula should only be used on Mr. Black; anyone else will immediately slip into a coma and die. Well, they should die. No, wait. That didn’t come out right, either. You know what I meant, right? Right.”
Superman was only slightly surprised when a dark-colored bottle shot out of the Zippo’s fire, but he managed to catch it all the same.
“Now that the immediate problem is solved—how is he?”
“No particular change. He’s still unconscious,“ the Man of Steel dutifully reported.
“I knew we should have made a better example the last time someone tried a stunt like this!“ one of the women fumed. “If we had just used your pest—or Cholera—this wouldn’t have happened!”
Clark wisely assumed the comment was not directed at him and was immediately proven correct when the other female voice answered.
“The situation didn’t seem quite as severe the first time, though I must admit that I’m beginning to see your point. Your little stomach disorders—no matter how memorable to the subjects—aren’t really stuff that makes history.”
“Little stomach disorders?! I’ll have you know that I’m far above things like ’little stomach disorders’—like making sure they can’t even look at food for weeks. After all, if people don’t suffer a little, how can they know when they stepped out of line?”
“Excuse me?“ Clark questioned instinctively.
The woman suddenly became contrite. “Oh, sorry. Forgot you were there,” the female voice admitted. “Just please give our brother our love when he wakes—and tell him to call us more often! Bye!”
The call disconnected and Clark found himself looking at the Zippo. Finally, he put it back on the table and carefully administered the strange ‘Dreamless Sleep’ substance.
Once his task was complete, the Man of Steel allowed his mind to replay his most recent conversation. Mr. Black’s sisters seemed normal enough—if one used their brother as a frame of reference, of course. But there was something disturbing about them at the same time.
’Wait a minute!’ Clark suddenly realized. ‘Did she say her pest and Cholera? And didn’t the other woman specialize in food…?’
“Any new developments?” the familiar voice of the resident Green Lantern asked as he strode into the room.
Clark bit back several sarcastic responses and greeted his friend. “Not really. Any word on how they’re doing locating that last temple?”
“Should be soon. And it seems Raven managed to get at least the most dire cases under control.”
“Good,” Clark breathed a sigh of relief. “Things are finally starting to look up.”
“You’d think so, but no such luck. That’s why I came here, actually.”
Kal El of Krypton sighed. “What is it now?”
“Tornados,” John Stewart answered bluntly, “a bunch of them.”
“Where?”
John snorted. “Everywhere. It’s like someone expanded Tornado Alley while we weren’t looking. Things aren’t looking pretty.”
The Man of Steel stiffened. “Kansas?” he asked worriedly.
“Almost all of it’s blanketed,” the Green Lantern admitted reluctantly. “There was one anomaly that might interest you, though. When Mr. Terrific accessed the satellite feed for that section, I saw a fair-sized area completely unscathed from the disaster afflicting the rest of the state. Incidentally, this twister-free zone is centered exactly around a farm owned by one Jonathan Kent.”
Suddenly, the voice of Mr. Black’s sister rang again in Clark’s head. ‘If they don’t suffer a little…’ It seems that the women took Hamilton’s treachery personally. Which would mean…
“We need to alert the W.H.O.!” Clark exclaimed. “Now!”
Henchgirl sighed heavily as the Polluter’s Repelling Potion turned a wrong color again. She emptied the cauldron and walked to the Doctor’s room.
“I’m going crazy just waiting for news like this!” the inventor complained as she let herself into the other woman’s room.
The mediwitch sighed. “I know, and I can’t help thinking that they might be in over their heads. They seem to rely solely on Muggle technology, and they might miss something important if it’s magical.”
“And he is lying there all defenseless,” Henchgirl lamented, “and we can’t be there to protect him. We won’t have a set of Transporting Mirrors ready to test for days yet!”
Doctor hummed to herself thoughtfully. “You know? Now that you mention it…”
“Yes?” the other witch perked up immediately. “You thought of something?”
“You and the Professor said that the new Port-Trans you designed becomes unstable when magical people are transported,” Doctor mentioned. “What about magical creatures?”
The Potions’ Mistress looked confused. “It should work fine in that case, but what good would that do?”
“Well… It may not be the best solution, but Harry at least needs some magical protection.”
Henchgirl impatiently motioned for her colleague to continue.
“After all, she is pretty much domesticated nowadays, and Nuni’s been missing him awfully. She’s even lost her appetite. Besides, with all the powers that his new friends have, they shouldn’t have a problem with one larger-than-average cat, right? And that will buy us some time to find a way to get him more help.”
The Potion Mistress looked at the other woman for a long moment before grinning. “Doctor, you’re brilliant!” she finally exclaimed.
Amanda Waller strode purposefully into Emil Hamilton’s lab and found the renegade scientist at his desk, laboring over what seemed to be a genetic sequencer and thoroughly ignoring his visitor. However, he did not ignore the envelope she dropped in front of him. Surprised, he opened it and removed an illustration of a dinosaur.
“Can you tell me what that is?” she asked upon his confused look.
“A dinosaur by the looks of it… definitely a Theropod. Allosaurus, if I’m not mistaken,” the man identified, “from the late Jurassic period.”
“Very good. Now,do you know why you can’t meet beasts like that anymore?”
“They died out,” Hamilton replied, stating the obvious.
“Everyone knows that much, but do you know the reason why they’re dead?” Waller pressed.
The goatee’d man shrugged. “There are a few working theories.”
“Watch,” the short woman instructed before inserting a disc into his computer. “This is surveillance footage I obtained from the Justice League hanger surveillance system.”
Hamilton watched the short exchange in the orbiting docking bay between Black and a couple of League members.
“Did you think about the possible consequences of your actions?” Waller demanded. “The dinosaurs didn’t, but at least they had walnut-sized brains as an excuse. Seen the news recently, Emil?”
“That just proves he is even more dangerous than we ever thought—more so than Superman could ever be!”
“Forget Superman!” Waller spat. “And forget the rest of the Justice League while you’re at it! We are talking about a being who, if he took offense—and, quite frankly, I don’t see how he could not take offense—could very well hold the whole humanity accountable.”
“In which case, the fact that I took steps to neutralize him—”
“Could easily mean that you’ve singlehandedly damned all of mankind!” she interrupted. “Once he is freed—and make no mistake, he will get free—Black is going to want a very good explanation for all of this. So does the President, for that matter, and he’s ordered me to make sure that we have one. Langley is very curious as to why you unilaterally declared war on the Pale Rider when he was willing to let matters remain as they were.”
Her phone rang. “Excuse me.” Amanda walked away from Hamilton’s desk as she listened to the person on the other side of the phone. She was visibly paler when she finished the call.
“Oh. Did I mention that Mr. Black’s family is getting involved now?”
“Did you get it?” Superman asked the disembarked Leaguers once he confirmed that they were all unharmed.
“Right here,” Kara replied tiredly while waving an assembled key-shaped artifact. “How is he?” she asked, the pronoun not requiring further explanation.
“Better now,” the Kryptonian admitted. “He was burning through Miss Isley’s sedative at a phenomenal rate, but the new… potion… that his sisters sent over has thankfully kept him asleep since then.”
“Still having nightmares, then?” Galatea asked guiltily.
“Oh, yeah,” John Stewart answered. “Between Zatanna and Doctor Fate, they’ve managed to protect most of the med lab. As for the rest…” He waved a hand at the damaged quarters that seemed to have withstood both exceptional heat and cold. The Green Lantern looked at Batman askance. “New suit?” he asked.
“Don’t ask,” the Dark Knight—a now even more apt description, given the armored additions—replied. “How’s the situation on the ground?” he asked as the group headed towards the medical wing.
“Not good, and worsening every minute,” Clark answered. “Raven’s doing the best she can, but the volume’s just too much. I sure hope this works.”
“We all do,” Diana assured as they entered the clinic and found the two magicians John mentioned ready to renew the shield around the single occupied bed if necessary.
Seeing Kara leading the group with the presumed key in her grasp, Pamela Isley breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness!” she exclaimed. “I was running out of variations of tranquilizer. He’s gained immunity to most of them already, and I don’t know how much longer this new stuff his sisters sent over will last.”
“Well, everyone cross your fingers,” the blonde girl replied as she slid the magical object into the restraints. Turning the jeweled artifact, the group held their collective breath for an instant—only to release it again as the bindings snapped open with a barely audible click.
“Why isn’t he awake?” Kara asked a few moments later, when Harry was still unresponsive. “Shouldn’t he be up, since they instantly put him to sleep before?”
“Listen, I’ve had to hit him with enough sedative to render everyone else on this station comatose for a year,” the Queen of Green replied a trifle testily. “It’s going to take a few minutes for him to recover, and even then he might be… not himself.”
Kara frowned upon hearing the redhead’s comment. “What do you mean, ‘not himself’?” she demanded. “Why would he be different?”
“Hey, Blondie, why’d you think?” the redheaded horticulturist demanded irritably. “Mr. Black’s biology is different from any other living thing I’ve ever seen. His responses to stimuli are completely unpredictable. He even had me attempt to green him once as an experiment, and the only thing that did was soothe his nerves. That’s it! I should have had him enthralled for a decade, and I couldn’t even compel him out of his chair! And besides all that, I had to resort to using some… let’s say… heavily regulated compounds to keep him asleep. So, I don’t know if there will be side effects, or what they will be. He might wake up and be perfectly fine, or he might jump out of bed singing show tunes. I just don’t know,” she finished tiredly. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry, too,” the Argosian apologized. “I’m just worried.”
Pamela Isley smiled briefly. “I know, but the only thing left to do now is to wait.”
Ever the detective, Batman latched onto her brief hesitation. “Exactly how heavily regulated are these substances?” he demanded.
The plant elemental consciously ignored her one-time adversary in favor of keeping watch on her patient.
“Well, if it’s gonna be a few minutes, I’m going to make sure that these can never be used again,” the blonde asserted, grabbing both the shackles and the key. “I figure throwing them into the sun should do it.” She then disappeared in a blue and red blur.
Moments after her departure, a male figure strongly resembling the still-unconscious Mr. Black appeared out of nowhere and gracelessly planted his face in the hospital ward’s floor.
“Oww…” the newly-arrived brunette muttered. “That’s gonna leave a mark.”
Immediately following his proclamation, a blonde girl appeared in the very same spot and, as a result of the first still-prone arrival, lost her balance and fell on top of her companion.
“Way to go, Dawnie,” a muffled voice congratulated sarcastically. “Very of the smooth. Now, would you please get off my kidney?” he grumbled.
The flaxen female hopped off her landing pad. “It’s your own fault,” she replied. “You’re the one who was in a hurry to escape the Matrimonial Marauders.”
“Hey!” the man protested. “You were the one who blabbed to the girls that I proposed to Ahn! This is all your fault!”
After a furious exchange of glances nominated him as the spokesman for the group, Superman stepped forward. “Excuse me but… who are you?”
Slowly climbing to his feet, the other man said, “I’m the one and only Xander—” he trailed off as he took in his surroundings “—Harris.” Turning to the girl at his side, he asked, “You know something, Dawn? When my darling older brother told us about his new friends living on a space station, he could have bothered to mention that they were the Justice League.”
“Cool!” the new female arrival stated excitedly. “So, why is Uncle Black here again?” she asked.
“If I had to guess,” Xander hypothesized, “I’d go with saving the universe, enjoying free enterprise… you know the drill.”
Waving to the bewildered costumed crowd, Xander announced. “Hello, everyone. As I said, my name’s Xander. This is Dawn Summers. I hear that my older brother’s had a bit of an accident. You might know him: average height, wears a black robe, good with agricultural equipment, kinda on the thin side. He might’ve introduced himself as Mr. Black…?”
A few of the League wordlessly pointed at the single occupied bed.
“Right then,” the brown-haired male nodded. “Hey, I thought he was chained up or something?”
“Err…we managed to get the shackles off,” the Man of Steel offered, “but we had to sedate him earlier and Mr. Black’s still asleep.”
“Thanks a lot, Big Guy,” Xander replied as he began setting out various potions. “Hey, I’m gonna need a cauldron or something.”
Dawn rolled her eyes. “Do I have to do everything?” she protested before digging a shrunken vessel out of her pants’ pocket. “How’s that?”
“Perfect,” came the reply as several ingredients were thrown into the vat, including Pepper Up Potion, a bag of blood, and a bottle of Firewhiskey.
“What’s all that for?” she asked curiously, having recognized a few of the ingredients.
Xander smiled. “Revenge. The last time he caught me asleep, the jerk stole all my classic Hawaiian shirts and gave them to that blasted Nundu of his for bedding. And, when I told the girls, they applauded!”
“Xander, they weren’t alone. Most of us wanted to nominate Mr. Black for sainthood—again,” the youngest Summers girl answered bluntly.
“Whatever,” he dismissed. “Ladle?” She handed over the scoop and he soon transferred a spoonful of the concoction to the reposed magician. “You all might want to move back,” Xander warned the costumed people hovering around the bed.
As soon as they complied, Harry jerked up to a sitting position as gouts of flame shot out from his ears and mouth.
“What did you do?” an upset female’s voice demanded. Without waiting for an answer, the just-arrived Supergirl zipped over and grabbed the apparent assailant by his throat. “Tell me!”
“Uh… Kara…?” the Argosian’s clone sister spoke up hesitantly.
“Not now!” the blonde girl growled.
“Kara,” an amused male voice instantly caught her attention, “why are you strangling my brother?”
The original Argosian blinked. “Brother?” she repeated before releasing her prey, speeding over to the bed, and proceeding to asphyxiate the newly awoken wizard with a super powered hug.
“Well, this is good,” Zatanna noted in a relieved tone from the other side of the room. “He appears to be perfectly fine.”
“I had my doubts,” Batman admitted, “but Black’s faith in you seems to be well placed. Well done, Pamela.”
While the Queen of Green preened, Kara was still inspecting the recently reanimated wizard. “You’re alive!”
Harry looked over himself. “Apparently so,” he agreed readily.
“But you were dead!” she protested.
The wizard shrugged half-heartedly. “I got better.”
“How do you feel?” Kara asked anxiously as she studied the reposed magician.
He grinned. “With my hands, usually.”
“Cute,” she replied in like kind. “Seriously, is everything working properly?”
“Let’s find out,” the wizard replied before casting several spells whilst perform an acrobatic routine. “Yep,” he finally decided after running up a wall and back flipping to land in a sitting position next to Kara, “everything checks out a-okay.”
“Great!” she breathed a sigh of relief. “The universe has gone nuts while you were sleeping, and every planet we’ve checked is becoming increasingly covered with zombies. We need your help.”
“Hmm,” Harry deliberated. “I think I’ll pass. Thanks, though,” he finally decided.
“What?” Kara voiced the sudden inquiry from most of the room’s occupants. “Can you repeat that?”
“I’m not really in the mood to go rid all creation of Inferi,” he explained brightly.
“Maybe I spoke too soon,” Zatanna muttered as Batman glared at the former plant-themed villainess, batarang in hand.
The Girl of Steel looked confused. “Umm… I’m not sure if you know what’s going on, but people have stopped dying. Everywhere.”
“I know,” the wizard admitted casually. “I can feel them. Heck, I can even hear several of them.”
“But… aren’t you supposed to stop stuff like this from happening?”
Harry shrugged unconcernedly. “Probably, but you know what I just realized? I’ve spent my entire existence fighting all the things that go bump in the night so that everyone else can live their happy little lives. You know what I’ve gotten for my troubles?” he suddenly demanded. “I’ve been insulted, slandered, ignored, hated, shunned, and feared. I’ve been called ‘Freak’ and ‘Monster’ and—on a few special occasions—‘Abomination’. I very rarely get thanked, though, so I’ve decided that I don’t want to do it anymore,” he announced, suddenly calm once more.
The blonde woman seemed only partially surprised, unlike most of their audience. “Well, what do you want to do?” she asked.
The black-coated magician’s smile widened. “Well, it starts with you, me, an empty stretch of beach, and very little clothing,” he elaborated.
“I’d like that,” the female metahuman admitted while inwardly cursing her luck. All those plans she laid with precision, and they couldn’t come to fruition a day or two prior! “But first… I’d really appreciate it if you could fix things first,” the blonde continued suggestively.
She leaned forward and whispered something in the magician’s ear—while her Kansas-raised cousin on the other side of the room made a show of ignoring the proceedings in favor of staring out the observation window.
“Really…?” Harry questioned curiously. “The green one, with the little…?”
Kara’s smile was more than a little impish as she nodded in reply.
“Right,” he said as he jumped off the bed, “save the universe and then celebrate. This requires transportation.” He put two fingers to his mouth and whistled shrilly. “Hey, Mortis! We’ve got a job to do!”
In response to his summons, the magical motorbike reappeared in the medical bay, along with its two passengers. Raising an eyebrow at the scene of his daughter holding his scythe in one hand with her other arm wrapped around Roxy Rocket, Harry huffed in amusement. “I’m sure there’s an absolutely fascinating story here that I’ll really want to hear later, but I need my bike back. Now.”
Raven hopped off the vehicle and immediately began to ramble off an apology whilst simultaneously attempting to return the scythe.
Harry finally silenced the girl’s anxious commentary by the simple expedient of hugging her. “It’s alright, Raven. You did the right thing, and I’m very proud of you. I’m just sorry that you got caught up in all this.”
“Well… we’re family, right?” she asked.
The wizard nodded sharply. “We are,” he agreed before vaulting onto Mortis and silently querying Death’s ring for the most efficient solution to the problem. “You all take care. I’ll be back before you know it.”
The next thing he knew, a certifiable female was situating herself on the motorbike behind him.
Harry turned his head and asked, “What do you think you’re doing, Kara?”
“What’s it look like, Bonehead? You don’t need to be out and about on your own right now, so I’m going with you,” she replied immediately.
“Err… I’m pretty sure that I’m supposed to do this sort of thing solo,” he stated. “Why am I taking you along again?”
Kara leaned forward and whispered in his ear.
Harry blinked surprisedly before grinning. “Ah, yes. Now I remember,” he replied. “I guess it’s just as well. My mum’s been pestering me to bring you for a visit anyway, and your mum wants to talk about your penchant for flying around in a miniskirt. Toodles, all. Oh, and Dawn?&nsbp; Keep an eye on Xander. We don’t want a repeat of last time”
Xander’s protests of innocence were drowned out when the wizard dumped the clutch. The bike launched itself forward with a roar, disappearing from sight just before colliding with the far wall as the pair began their rounds.
“I believe it safe to say that Mr. Black did indeed have a reaction to your concoction, Miss Isley,” Dr. Fate noted.
“Ya think?” Shayera demanded incredulously. “I saw it, and I still can’t believe it. I mean, the fate of the universe… traded off for a superpowered booty call?”
“It does make sense from a certain point of view,” the sorceror professed. “As a force of Order, Mr. Black must be in balance. If we assume that those binds unsettle the equilibrium between Life and Death by diverting the ambient Death energies into his own form—thereby creating the suspended state of animation—then it stands to reason that Mr. Black must also bolster his Life energy to compensate. Historically, this transfer can be facilitated via the transfer of blood or by a certain set of rituals of a… private nature.”
“The blood requirement does support some of our observations,” Diana allowed. “Batman and I witnessed a very strange reaction at the genetic level when foreign sources of blood were introduced.”
Despite the obstructing mask, Dr. Fate’s expression still somehow conveyed his interest. “Truly?” Directing his attention to the lounging Xander, the magician asked, “Are you allowed to confirm or deny this supposition?”
Meanwhile, Xander struggled to suppress the sudden onslaught of maniacal laughter. While he had often witnessed the aftereffects of these wildly inaccurate tangents regarding Harry, never before had he observed the proceedings firsthand. Manfully forcing his expression to remain neutral, the demon hunter calmly stated, “That sounds like a theory.”
Hurriedly changing the topic before he could crack, Xander approached the youngest people in the room and introduced himself again. “And you two must be Raven and Tim, the newest adopted members of our little family. How’re you doing, kids?”
“’Bout like you’d expect,” Tim announced. “Watching the universe fall to pieces while being stuck here unable to help.”
The latest male dimensional traveler nodded. “Yeah, the sideline does majorly suck, doesn’t it?” He thought for a moment. “Want to accompany me on a little errand?”
“Like what?” the Hunter scion inquired.
“Like paying a little visit to the ones responsible for this mess, of course,” Xander replied offhandedly. “Speaking of which… who is responsible?”
“Dr. Emil Hamilton,” Galatea answered dejectedly.
The brightly-dressed young man looked thoughtful. “Hamilton, huh? Let’s see… If you don’t mind my asking, Power Girl, is your birth name Kara Zor-L or Galatea?”
“’Power Girl’?” Galatea echoed confusedly.
“Oops,” he apologized sheepishly, “you haven’t picked a codename yet, have you?”
“Umm… no, I haven’t. And my name’s Galatea, by the way, or just Tea.”
“Gotcha. So… that would make this Hamilton the chief genetics scientist for ‘Project: Cadmus’ and formerly from S.T.A.R. Labs, then?” he half-asked, half-stated.
“He used to be,” Clark spoke up. “Cadmus was dismantled shortly after a… misunderstanding of intent.”
The Hawaiian shirt-wearing man nodded. “Right, right. The Ultimen clone army. I remember this dimension’s particulars now.”
“Wait a second,” Dawn objected. “I remember this one now, too.” Turning to her companion, the girl asked, “Shouldn’t she be… well, you know?”
Xander shrugged. “My brother moves in mysterious ways,” he unconcernedly offered while looking at their surroundings yet again. “By the way,” the man remarked whilst brandishing a Black Hole, “have any of you seen a rather large and frequently irritable Nundu running around? It appears that the girls have misplaced my brother’s housecat.”
“Bye, Pete, catch you next time!” Kara called as Harry started the motorbike again. Jumping back on the passenger seat, the blonde metahuman scooted up next to her boyfriend. “He wasn’t exactly what I had in mind when I thought of a gatekeeper,” she confided. “I guess I was expecting someone a little more… saintly.”
“You’ve got to admire the man’s collection of bar jokes, though,” Harry maintained.
Kara nodded. “True. Ah well, that’s the last of the stranded souls from the entire universe. So, what’s next?”
“Now we face the music,” the wizard supplied as he once more shifted them between dimensions.
‘One of the few good things of my last little adventure,’ Harry thought ruefully to himself. ‘Thanks to that ruddy remote, I finally got a feel for temporal and dimensional Apparation.’
“You mean it?” she asked disbelievingly. “I can actually… see them?”
Harry shrugged as the bike slipped into the void. “Well, you have been nice enough to help me sort out this mess. By the way, I’m sorry for what I said to you earlier. I… wasn’t myself.”
Kara purposely stretched against him. “Pity,” she teased, “I’ve been trying to get your attention for weeks now. I thought I’d finally come up with the perfect plan when we were on the beach, but we got interrupted… again! I mean, Clark may like to drag out a courtship for decades, but I want to do more than just hold hands at the occasional family dinner before I’m forty!”
Her verbal parry earned a response, as Harry looked over his shoulder with a confused expression. After all, he had been under the impression that things were going well between them.
“More? Like what?” he asked.
The extraterrestrial just gave him a look. “You know.”
“‘You know’ what?” Lara In Ze demanded, demonstrating once again that the maternal ability to catch their children’s missteps was not limited solely to humankind.
“Oh, look,” Harry observed with artificial surprise in his voice. “We’re here.”
Kara smiled dangerously at him. “This isn’t over,” the young woman promised even as she was dragged into an emotion-filled family reunion.
“Are you sure you’re up to going in with us?” Xander asked once Galatea led the group to a guarded research center. “I mean, he’s probably still got that remote of his with him.”
The blonde woman was silent for a few moments. “I know what to watch out for now. This is my mess; I’ll clean it up.”
“Alright, then,” he accepted, “let’s go introduce ourselves to the nice guards over there.”
A few moments later, the party let themselves into the facility, and Galatea led Xander, Dawn, Tim, and Raven to Hamilton’s lab—and promptly jumped aside as two paramedics rushed a heavily bandaged human male out of the room and towards the express lift.
“Hey, Waller,” the clone tossed out casually when she identified the room’s sole other occupant. “Where’s the doc?”
“You just missed him,” the shorter woman replied, “though apparently Black didn’t.”
“What?” the artificial Argosian demanded. “What do you mean?”
“Apparently, the good doctor was attempting to recreate… well, let’s just say that you were going to have another sister, shall we?”
“But why?”
Waller shrugged. “From the interrogation I just put him through, he apparently thought that the League had compromised you somehow. After his confession, I left the room to phone the President. While I was gone, Emil apparently began the initial stages of creating the embryo when he suffered an… accident.”
”Did anyone else hear the added emphasis?” Xander asked jokingly. “’Cause I sure did.”
“And who are you?” the dark-skinned woman demanded, immediately shifting topics.
Xander considered the question for a brief moment before smiling brightly. “You may call me Nighthawk, or Mr. Blue,” he replied. “I’m Mr. Black’s younger and far more charming brother. This is—”
“Key,” Dawn interrupted, “and Mr. Black’s my uncle. Now, I’m getting the impression that you don’t think Hamilton’s accident was entirely by chance.”
“I think that it’s a blatant case of Assault and Battery—except that there’s not a single shred of proof. Within minutes of Project Longshadow’s demise and Mr. Black’s recorded promise to ‘take care of the situation’, all forty seven of Cadmus’s covert biological archives were simultaneously destroyed under mysterious circumstances. All research was irreversibly lost, and all genetic material in the library was rendered completely unsalvageable. Now, after attempting to resynthesize Galatea’s biological data and forcing her to attack Mr. Black, Hamilton conveniently suffers an ‘accident’. The coincidence is positively staggering.”
“But there’s no proof of any foul play, right?” Dawn asked, more than familiar with the signs of a ‘Black Attack’. If she was attentive with this latest incident, she might even win this month’s contest amongst Mr. Black’s agents for the most unusual incident. “Would you please describe the… accident.”
“Shortly after the television networks reported that the affected people were starting to die—which I assume to mean that the League somehow freed Mr. Black—Hamilton’s desk chair broke, sending him falling to the metal floor. In the process, his leg became wrapped around the computer terminal’s power cable. When his glass of water was knocked off the desk, he suffered a severe electrocution. The surveillance recordings then show him climbing to his feet with the assistance of a full-height industrial-strength paper shredder. Somehow, the shredder activated and caught Hamilton’s necktie, delivering severe blunt force trauma to the front of his head. Emil managed to free himself, only to slip on the floor, hit his head against the desk, and electrocute himself again.”
Smiling brightly at the assured win, the girl asked, “Is that all?”
“Then the entire fifteen hundred pound computer bank tipped over on top of him, putting Hamilton in traction,” Waller added.
The demon-fighting duo looked at each other. “That sounds about right to me,” Xander allowed.
“Certainly seems like he’s been here,” Dawn admitted. “I guess that covers everything. Uncle Black’s back on the job, this jerk was beat within an inch of his life, and I’ve got a shot at winning this month’s jackpot for the strangest Black Attack. I guess we’re done here.”
“Not quite,” Xander corrected. “There’s still the matter of exactly how Hamilton’s little toy turned Tea here into Mind Control Girl. What’s the what, Waller?”
After the short Department Head translated the speech, she hesitated before briefing the small group on Galatea’s implanted neural inhibitor. Needless to say, the group was less than pleased to learn of the nefarious device’s existence. The news hit the cloned Argosian particularly hard, as she had considered the apparently unbalanced scientist to be a father figure.
“And Tickle Me Emil set this lead-shielded thing so that any tampering releases Kryptonite directly into her brain?” Xander demanded.
“The President wishes to clarify that Dr. Hamilton’s actions were completely unauthorized. The United States government had no awareness of this unsanctioned operation.”
Xander snorted. “And you expect us to believe that a guy who’s probably not stepped foot out of a science lab in thirty years just happened to stumble across those shackles all by himself? Pull the other one, why don’t you?”
Giving Waller a knowing look, Xander turned to the downcast blonde. “Don’t worry about it, Tea. As soon as my brother’s done saving the universe, we’ll have him look at you. He’s good at stuff like this.”
Before he could further reassure the woman, the group was interrupted by the sudden, panicked arrival of the two paramedics from earlier.
“Run for your lives!” one of the medics yelled as they ran further away from the building’s entrance. “There’s a monster, man-eating cat on the loose!”
The two Sunnydale residents looked at one another. “So that’s where Nuni ran off to. Later, Waller,” Dawn called before leading the group towards the exit. “We’d better go catch my uncle’s cat.”
After finally separating the Nundu from the even further battered Emil Hamilton—who seemed to make an adequate cat toy judging from Nuni’s sulking—the group returned to the Watchtower to await Harry’s and Kara’s return. This occasion occurred sooner than they expected and was heralded by the unnaturally loud exhaust of an approaching motorbike. They tracked the source and found the pair exchanging teasing barbs from atop the two-wheeled conveyance.
“Hi, Uncle Black!” Dawn greeted, succeeding in interrupting the sickening display.
Harry smiled as he and Kara dismounted. “Hello, Dawn. Xander. What brings you here?”
“You, actually,” she admitted. “We got word that the universe was falling apart while you took a nap, so we decided to drop by and look in on things.”
“That’s very kind of you,” he replied. “So… what are we dealing with here?”
Xander and Dawn filled in the new arrivals on the latest developments.
“So…” Harry paused, “Hamilton’s in a full body cast, you say?”
Xander nodded. “Quite possibly. Any particular reason for your interest?” he asked amusedly.
Poorly concealing his own smile upon learning the misfortune of the man who had abused Galatea’s trust, the wizard shook his head. “No reason,” Harry replied, “no reason at all. Now, tell me more about this mind control chip thing.”
They proceeded to do just that, and Harry soon had the entire story behind his friend’s neural inhibitor.
“Right then,” the magician announced once they were finished, “that’s gonna have to come out… right now. Take a seat over here, Tea, and let’s have a look at you.”
When she did so, the wizard squatted down in front of her. “I need you to stay very still, understand? Can you do that for me?”
Her blue eyes clearly showing both grief and fear, the extraterrestrial clone nodded hesitantly.
“Good girl,” Harry reassured her with a smile. Once he located the lead-plated capsule with Mage Sight, the wizard slowly phased one hand inside the blonde woman’s head and carefully froze the device before phasing and removing it in one smooth movement.
“There,” Harry said with a note of finality, “all done! How’re you feeling?”
Galatea considered the question. “I’ve got a major brain freeze going, but I’ll be fine.” She bit her lip as she stared at him, almost as if she didn’t know how to act around him.
Demonstrating an insight that—quite frankly—took him completely by surprise, Harry understood the white stocking-clad woman’s hesitation. With a small, resigned sigh, the wizard held his arms outstretched and his impromptu patient wasted no time in embracing him fiercely while babbling desperate apologies and incoherent explanations.
Awkwardly, Harry patted her back. “I understand, Tea. You weren’t yourself, and I don’t blame you for what happened. Now, Hamilton on the other hand…”
“Oh, I think he’s learned his lesson,” Xander asserted. “Now, since Tea’s out of the woods, we really need to talk.”
“Now?” Harry and Kara asked in stereo, and for the same reason.
The other man nodded.
“Alright then, Xander. Let’s borrow that room over there,” the wizard conceded before turning his attention to the rest of the group. “Sorry, Kara. Tea. Kids. This shouldn’t take long.”
Apparently, the blonde’s displeasure at the men’s departure was rather obvious, as she was interrupted mid-sulk by her new acquaintance.
“Sorry about that,” Dawn said. “Xander’s not exactly the most socially adjusted male out there.”
The Argosian just grumbled.
“I’m just saying that you shouldn’t let him prevent you from making the most of things… like, say, listening in on their conversation,” the Sunnydale resident continued brightly.
Kara looked at the other female contemplatively. “And how do you propose to do that? Joe’s got this bad habit of doing something that interferes with eavesdropping.”
“With this,” Dawn pledged as she brandished a strange looking radio. “A couple goofballs I know made these.” At the group’s confused look, she elaborated, “I bugged Xander when he wasn’t looking.”
Both blondes smiled. “Should I ask why?” Supergirl questioned.
Dawn huffed. “The last time those two went on a vacation together, they were gone over six centuries! And they left me behind!” Her mood noticeably brightened when Xander’s voice came through the radio.
“Shh… they’re starting,” the girl cautioned needlessly. “Gather ’round, Cousins.”
“Wait a minute, Batman,” Diana called out in an annoyed tone. “Did you see what I did with that folder I was holding a few hours ago?”
“You laid it down in Conference Room Six—where we were discussing Monitor Duty rotations before Mr. Black’s… indisposition,” the World’s Greatest Detective immediately replied. “Why?”
“It was some research I was doing for Mother—modern legal procedures and whatnot. You go ahead; I’ll catch up in a few moments.”
Gotham’s original vigilante tilted his cowled head curiously as he followed the woman back the way they came. “Dare I ask why?”
“It was something that Mr. Black got her thinking about after our little scuffle on Themyscira,” the Amazon’s Princess replied. “After consulting with the gods, Mother is considering opening an embassy in Man’s World.”
“Really?” he asked amusedly.
Diana nodded. “I know,” she agreed. “I mean, I thought that she would nev—”
Batman motioned for silence, and then pointed towards the opened door to their destination.
Wonder Woman rolled her eyes at her significant other’s security obsession—but obediently fell silent so as to eaves… observe their new guest as she talked with Supergirl, Galatea and the two magical teenagers that Black adopted.
“So, what have you been up to?” Xander asked once they were alone.
Harry shrugged. “A little of this, a little of that. Nothing major.”
“Your costumed friends out there are singing a different tune,” his brother disagreed. “While you and Kara were off saving the universe—good job on that, by the way—I was brought up to speed on all kinds of interesting gossip that you somehow forgot to mention when you called home. Like your little Halloween bash with Morgana and Etrigan… Gabriel.”
“Oh, shut up,” Harry muttered.
“Hark! The Harold angel sings—” Xander began singing before his brother Banished him into the wall.
“Like you did any better with your costume this year, Michael?” the green-eyed wizard inquired mockingly.
“Hey, dressing up as Death Incarnate, the Left Hand of God, and a deity forty-something times over is a pretty hard act to follow,” Xander protested as he righted himself. “I mean, I couldn’t dress as you two years in a row, now could I?”
“Whatever,” the other magician dismissed. “You said we needed to talk?” he prompted.
The Sunnydale native turned immortal wizard nodded in agreement. “Oh, yeah. I wanted to tell you that your Nundu is waiting for you outside of Gotham.”
Harry blinked. “Okay… and why is Nuni in Gotham of all places?”
“Well…” the other man hesitated, “She was getting restless on the island, so the girls thought that she could hang out with you here. So Tea, the kids and I finally corralled it into your room up here.”
The wizard nodded. “I’m with you so far.”
“Right, well, the thing is, none of us knew that you had a portal set up between your dorm room here and the club in San Francisco. Nuni found it, though, and went exploring. Then, apparently, she stumbled across Harley’s pet hyenas and got into a… well, let’s call it a territorial dispute.”
Harry sighed. “How bad is it?”
“Nothing that some spackling won’t fix,” Xander assured the anxious owner of both Nundu and club. “And some lumber, a few truckloads of bricks, a couple mixer trucks worth of concrete, lumber… hey, you don’t happen to know a good plumber, do you?”
The elder magician rested his head resolutely on the table. “And Nuni?”
“Oh, she’s fine. Pamela recommended her friend Selina as a cat-sitter, so we coaxed Nuni through another portal and left her there.”
Harry jerked his head aloft. “You left Nuni with strangers?! What if she gets lonely, or sick?”
“I’m sure that Catwoman will be just fine,” Xander assured the worried wizard. “She’s got a lot of experience with rare feline breeds, after all.”
“Catwoman?” Harry crinkled his nose in confusion. “I was talking about Nuni. You remembered to leave her favorite toys, right?”
Xander just shook his head. “Nundu toys, right. Listen, that brings us to the next topic, namely… when are you coming home?!” he demanded desperately. “I’ve been trying to cover your job and mine, but it’s just too much. Just this week, I’ve had to authorize the construction of three annexes for the Architect, evaluate seventeen projects for the twins and the Acme girls, settle a dispute between the Yuki-onna and the Veela on the proper temperature of the indoor swimming pool—”
“We have an indoor swimming pool?” Harry interrupted curiously.
The other man nodded. “That was the Architect’s project last week. Anyway, since the kid is due soon, the Pencil’s been stressing out even more than usual—and it somehow became my job to talk some sense into him! Then, there’s the usual mess with the acquisitions for the library, approving the field expenditures for the various agents you’ve assigned all over the place. Oh, yeah, and I have forty seven written requests for dispute mediation waiting for you when you return to the Island.”
Harry just stared at the other man gasping upon reaching the end of the list. “Take a deep breath, Xander,” he advised amusedly.
“How do you do it?” the other man demanded. “Every time I turn around, there’s ten people needing me to sign something, or oversee a project, or stomp on some new wannabe dark lord’s neck… I’m fixing to loose my mind!”
The emerald-eyed wizard smiled. “Too late,” he confided.
Xander just glared before matching his brother’s mischievous expression. “Oh, I also wanted to congratulate your superior handling of this whole situation.”
“Err… thanks?” Harry offered.
“I mean, your little coup in Gotham was a stroke of genius, what with Harley Quinn finally getting the help she needs and the Joker confined to a wheelchair—”
Harry raised a hand. “Actually, Joker’s dead,” he corrected. “He was apparently trying to assemble one of his joy buzzers earlier today and grounded out his metal wheelchair. Chasing down an insane, paralyzed, and electrified clown zombie wasn’t pretty.”
“Better you than me,” Xander replied smugly, “but I just love the irony. With them out of action, Barbara Gordon’s never going to receive that paralyzing gunshot wound that would have otherwise irreversibly ruined her life. Not to mention the horror that Tim Drake would have incurred at the clown’s hands—or what would have happened when the Joker learned who Batman was under the mask. Very impressive, coming from someone who’s sworn off the hero thing.”
Harry looked at Xander oddly. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
Xander found it equally strange that his brother had never read the comics nor seen the shows based on his new friends. “Sure you don’t,” he agreed disbelievingly. “I mean, if you had, you’d have gone for the hat trick and given Alfred a few extra years of life or something.”
The emerald-eyed magician cleared his throat and looked off to the side.
“I see…” Xander acknowledged. “You know, I couldn’t help but notice that there was a certain amount of chemistry between a particular Dark Knight and a Princess out there.”
Mr. Black nodded. “Yes, I’m rather happy for the both of them.”
“And you had nothing to do with that, I’m sure,” Xander prompted.
His brother shrugged. “He had some concerns, and I addressed them. Everything else has been all them. Why do you ask?”
“Oh, no reason. I was just thinking of some of the possible ramifications of a relationship between the two of them. Like, I don’t know, the Bat restraining some of Wonder Woman’s more… impetuous tendencies, and Diana repaying him by proving through example that not all metahumans deserve around-the-clock surveillance. I don’t suppose you managed any heart-to-hearts with Zatanna, did you?” he asked the apparent non sequitur. “Maybe regarding when to use mental magics like Legilimency and Obliviation?”
“It might’ve come up,” Harry admitted easily.
Xander smiled. “Very clever!” he praised. “With Diana working on his metahuman hang-ups and Zatanna not going all Mindwipe Girl on the Bat, there won’t be any strain to break up the League! And that means no Brother Eye and OMACs! Without them, Diana’s reputation will never be destroyed and the Amazons will never be invaded and destroyed.” The Sunnydale inhabitant laughed. “You singlehandedly averted the entire Identity Crisis—years before it could ever erupt! Over a million people spared from all that pain—and they’ll never even know they were in danger.”
The eldest living Potter leaned back his chair and propped his feet up on the table. Shaking his head at his brother’s ramblings, Harry said, “I’m sure you realize that I haven’t the faintest clue what you’re going on about.”
“Right…” Xander drawled disbelievingly, “and I’m sure that it was a coincidence that you adopted Raven before Trigon could possess her body and soul, warping her into an evil, mind mojoing puppet?”
Now extremely intrigued by where Xander was getting his information—he had been rather careful when reporting the details regarding the “minor demon” that was Raven’s original biological father—Harry raised an objection. “Raven’s a strong girl; I’m sure that she would have fought against such a thing if she had to.”
“Oh, you know that she would have,” Xander agreed. “She fought very hard—not that it ultimately did any good. Trigon is an Old One, after all, so there was much badness all around. By the way, I can’t imagine that the antlered wonder’s too happy with you stealing away his future puppet. Any idea where he’s at?”
Harry smiled smugly. “Brother mine, I know exactly where he is at this very moment.”
“You don’t seem very worried.”
Lips turning upwards, he simply replied, “I’m not. He had a bit of an… accident.”
“Riiight… So, have you done anything with his stuff yet?” Xander asked. “He did reign over more than a few dimensions, after all. I mean, with the sudden power vacuum, things are bound to be a little… hectic.”
Harry frowned. “Bugger! I knew I was forgetting something!” He shrugged. “Ah, well. I’ll get around to looking it over one of these days.”
“Sure thing… anyway, I can’t help but notice the same story with our young Mr. Hunter,” the Sunnydale resident continued, “what with that downward spiral into dark magic he was heading for. It’s a good thing that you just happened to bump into him and provide an alternative to him running away from home.”
Harry nodded. “I was happy to help.”
Xander snorted. “And you’re telling me that it was sheer coincidence that you managed to catch two youths with that much potential, both of whom were destined to be ignored by the local mystic community?”
The elder wizard chuckled. “Why, Xander, are you suggesting that I somehow miraculously arranged all of this? Subtly nudging dozens of people away from their poor choices and so forth years in advance? I mean, you make this little vacation of mine sound so… premeditated… when you explain it that way.”
“It does, doesn’t it?” Xander agreed before changing the subject back to the two adopted teenagers. “It’s going to take a lot of effort to keep that pair on the straight and narrow, you know,” he warned. “The other side’s got queues waiting to subvert those kids.”
The green-eyed wizard shrugged. “If anyone gets the stones to come after either of them, I’ll simply kill the gits responsible. Besides, since when has anything worthwhile ever been easy for us?”
Xander just stared at his sibling for a few moments. “Good point. So… business as usual, then?”
“Admit nothing, deny everything,” Harry agreed.
“You know, if it’s your goal to solve all the League’s problems before they develop, you might want to work out the kinks in the Atom’s personal life,” Xander eventually mentioned as their little conference concluded. “His wife’s not too happy with him at the moment and will go completely nuts in a few years after their divorce.”
“We’ve talked,” the other wizard confided. “He decided that his work was consuming too much of his time and vowed to pay more attention to Jean and less to his lab. Problem solved.”
Xander just shook his head. “You know,” he deliberated, “I’m beginning to think that you really are omniscient. All hail the invincible Mr. Black, instrument of Divine Punishment and Defender of the Just.”
“Oh, shut up,” Harry muttered before striding to the sole exit. He was stopped, however, by his brother’s next inquiry.
“There’s just one thing I don’t get,” Xander called.
“Oh? What’s that?”
“What’s the deal with you and Kara? I mean, she’s not exactly your type.”
Harry looked at the room’s other occupant intently. “Meaning?”
“Well…” Xander began. “She’s nice. And polite. And believes that every life is sacred—I’m not completely sure that she even can kill someone. On the other hand, you’re… well, you.”
The British wizard sighed. “I’d be lying if I said I haven’t asked myself the same question.” He suddenly huffed in amusement. “Oddly enough, my… job… doesn’t seem to bother her at all. Her mother either, for that matter.” Harry considered his last statement for a moment. “Do you think it’s an Argosian thing?”
“In Lara In Ze’s case, I think it’s more a ‘Dear God, my baby girl’s dating Death! What am I going to do?’ sort of thing,” Xander theorized. “Now Kara, on the other hand… I’m drawing a blank, especially since I’m here now. You know that the hot, superpowered girls just can’t keep their hands off me.”
Harry snorted. “That’s usually because they’re trying to kill you in as drawn out and painful a manner as possible.”
“What’s your point?”
Harry shook his head before noticing one of the Weasley twin’s products stuck to the back of his brother’s coat. Removing it for him, the wizard commented, “By the way, be sure that Dawn gets her toy back when you’re done with it, would you?”
Exiting the room, Harry’s forward progress was again halted as he came face to face with a not-so-patiently waiting Kara. “Hello,” he greeted the young woman—who ignored him in favor of glaring at Xander and tapping her foot imperiously.
“Done now?” she demanded archly.
Xander looked between the unlikely pair and smirked at her possessiveness. “Yep, all yours.”
“Good,” the Argosian answered sharply. “If the universe self-destructs again before tomorrow… get somebody else to take care of it,” she ordered before snatching Harry and zipping back to his warded room at super speed. Oddly enough, their exit velocity seemed to knock Xander off his feet as they vanished from the room.
Dawn eyed the other Sunnydale resident as he climbed back to his feet. “I so saw that coming.”
“Well, at least we know why Mr. Black stayed around after defeating Trigon,” Diana offered after the pair of League founders dodged Black’s visiting family, “but I don’t understand most of their references. What happens… would have happened to us in the future, Bruce? Do you think this ‘Brother Eye’ is some sort of warlord in the future?”
Caught up in his own ponderings, the Dark Knight missed the slip in proper address. “I can only extrapolate from their conversation, Diana,” Batman admitted.
His omitted response to the latter part of her query sparked her curiosity. “Which doesn’t exclude you from having a theory,” the Amazon pressed.
Deciding against an outright lie, the World’s Greatest Detective attempted to dismiss the issue. “It’s merely a security concept, Diana,” he answered, “nothing to get worried about.”
Her suspicions building, Wonder Woman crossed her arms. “What sort of security concept?” she demanded.
“Waller’s people did have a few solid ideas,” Batman dodged the query again. “Left unchecked, a small group of metahumans could create all sorts of catastrophes. Someone needs to keep an eye on things.”
“So you immediately began brainstorming a way of monitoring every metahuman in… what? the United States? North America? The whole planet?” she asked incredulously.
Bruce looked off to the side. “I warned you that I had issues,” he stated gruffly.
“Which we will be discussing later tonight—at length,” the shapely warrior pledged. “Meanwhile, the others should be told of all that we just learned.”
Her boyfriend stared at her blankly.
“Okay,” she finally admitted, “maybe not all of it.” Withdrawing to the private chamber reserved for the original seven League members, the pair brought their colleagues up-to-date with their latest findings.
No sooner had the others accepted the latest in a long line of sensational news regarding the mysterious cosmic force that is Mr. Black—including the report that the dinosaur extinction 65 million years ago was due to their being poor neighbors—then the group’s deliberations were interrupted. The sudden and unexpected red alert blared in every corner of the space station—except, of course, a certain warded dormitory whose two occupants were presently unconcerned about such things.
As the founding members of the Justice League jumped out of their seats, Mr. Terrific’s voice emanated from the public address system. “All League members and personnel, this is an Alpha level alert! There are unidentified, armed intruders on the Bridge! I repeat, there are unidentified, armed intruders on the Bridge!”
Flash was out the door before the others were even on their feet. Superman picked up Batman and immediately sped towards the central control room as Green Lantern, Hawkgirl and Diana following as best they could. Moments later, the founding members had joined the rest of the on-call superheroes arrayed in a rough circle around—of all things—two tall skeletons in black robes. Each flesh-less intruder casually gripped a scythe in their bony hands, and somehow bore sheepish expressions on their skulls.
The menacing figure on the left, whose robes seemed to have a blood red inner lining, shook his head in annoyance and turned to his compatriot. “Dat was a fine way ta introduce yourself! ‘Cower, brief mortals’ indeed!”
While the first skeleton demonstrated a Jamaican accent to his otherwise normal voice, his companion possessed a deep, cavernous tone that echoed through the bones of everyone present. “IT WAS SIMPLY A FORCE OF HABIT. I DO NOT ASSOCIATE WITH MORTALS AS MUCH AS YOU DO OUTSIDE OF WORKING HOURS.”
A red blur zipped through the crowd of heroes and skidded to a stop in front of the two intruders. “Hey, are you guys looking for Mr. Black?” Flash asked in his typical abrupt manner.
“Let me do de talking,” the Jamaican skeleton muttered to his colleague, then stepped forward. “As a matter of fact, we are. Unfortunately, we’re having a bit of trouble locating him.”
Superman lowered Batman in front of the forbidding pair before landing beside the Gotham-based vigilante. “Perhaps some introductions are in order?” he prompted politely even as he positioned himself between the two talking skeletons and the majority of the League members.
The chattier of the two intruders smacked himself in the skull. “Of course! How rude of us. I am de Grim Reaper, but you can just call me ‘Grim’. My colleague here is Death, but he goes by de name ’Bill’ when dere’s more dan one of us deaths around.”
Most of the collected heroes started muttering amongst themselves nervously—especially given the recent Death service outage—but Batman’s eyes narrowed. “What is the difference between a grim reaper and the personification of death?”
“THERE ISN’T A DIFFERENCE, REALLY,” the second figure replied. “WE CHOOSE TO GO BY DIFFERENT NAMES, BUT OUR ROLES ARE ESSENTIALLY THE SAME; TO HARVEST THE SOULS OF THE NEWLY DEAD AND GUIDE THEM TO THEIR PROPER DESTINATION.”
The Dark Knight wasn’t satisfied. “Why are there two of you?“
Grim fielded that question. “I am de current reaper for Earth in de dimension dat Mr. Black hails from, while Bill here is de ’Death’ of a discworld, which rests on de backs of four gigantic elephants, who in turn stand upon de shell of de Great A’Tuin, de star turtle.”
“So each world has its own ‘Death’?” Batman pressed in an attempt to understand the political structure of the Underworld.
“USUALLY, THOUGH SOMETIMES THERE ARE MORE THAN ONE,” the Discworld Death explained. “I, FOR EXAMPLE, AM ASSISTED BY DEATH OF RATS, WHO HARVESTS THE SOULS OF VERMIN AND VERMIN-LIKE INDIVIDUALS.”
Superman grinned as images of a wailing Lex Luthor fleeing from a tiny scythe-wielding rat skeleton, popped into his head.
Sparing a moment to glare at the quietly snickering Man of Steel, Bruce Wayne turned back to the two skeletons. “And where does Black fit into this?”
“He’s a Death, too,” Grim explained, “and my boss. He’s been on vacation for a while now ‘doh, and since he’s been overseeing t’ings in dis universe as a favor, we decided to come pick him up for de Union meeting—in case he hasn’t gotten de notice yet.”
Hawkgirl frowned in confusion. “Wait a minute. If Mr. Black’s actually in charge of another universe, why didn’t you just ask the Death of this universe to check up on him?”
“That’s a good question, Shayera.” Everyone, save the two talking skeletons, jumped as an attractive goth girl dressed in black clothes and wearing a silver Ankh just appeared next to the grim pair.
Grim chuckled nervously. “Well, de t’ing is dat Madame Mort here is a bit higher ranking dan either of us, and it would be a bit rude to ask her to do a simple errand like this.”
Batman’s eyes narrowed further. “What is Mr. Black’s exact rank?”
Superman jumped in, shooting the Dark Knight a warning glance. “If you don’t mind us asking, that is.”
The new female Death tapped her chin with a black-nailed finger in thought. “Well… let me put it this way. Grim and Bill are the Deaths of their respective worlds. On the other hand, I am the Death of this entire universe—it’s my job to close everything up when the universe ends—so the rest of the Deaths in this dimension report to me. Mr. Black’s my corollary in his universe, and Grim’s his second in command on that Earth. Joe was nice enough to take over for me here while I attended the Union meeting for this dimensional sector.”
“Umm… excuse me, Miss… err… Death?” Flash hesitantly hailed the Goth’s attention.
She grinned amusedly. “You can call me ‘DeeDee’ if it’s any easier for you,” the Anthropomorphic Personification offered.
“Thanks… err… DeeDee. I was just wondering… Are you and Mr. Black related? ’Cause there’s a definite resemblance.”
Death smiled impishly. “There is, isn’t there?” she agreed. “I suppose you could say that we’re cousins—sort of.”
“So,” Grim changed the subject, “the Boss is still here, then?”
“Yeah,” Galatea spoke up, “he’s in his room but he’s—” Grim disappeared without warning “—got company. Well, this can’t end well,” she finished bemusedly.
The cloned Argosian’s prophecy was validated only moments later as a green-edged portal appeared in midair—an instant before several bones and tattered pieces of black cloth were ejected. The deluge continued until Grim’s protesting skull bounced to a rest next to his disassembled body. Finally, his scythe was thrown through the mystical opening before the portal winked out of existence.
“You alright there, Grim?” the female Death asked amusedly.
“I’ll be fine, Lady Teleute,” the scattered skeleton promised, “but de Boss is in trouble. Der’s a she-demon in dere attacking him. Dey’re wrestling on the floor and, when I tried to get ‘er off, she hacked me apart with me own scythe while yelling for me to come back tomorrow! I t’ink she’s also mind controlling de Boss, since he created de portal ta toss me back here.”
Trying—and failing—to conceal a smile, the female Death replied, “Joe’s a big boy. I’m sure he can handle this… battle… by himself.”
“BUT IF MR. BLACK IS BEING ATTACKED, IT IS OUR RESPONSIBILITY TO ASSIST HIM,” Bill insisted.
She smiled. “Trust me, Joe wouldn’t appreciate your going back in there to… err… save him. Just leave a note on his door or something; I’m sure he’ll get it eventually. In the meanwhile, I think we should welcome Joe’s daughter—and our newest coworker—into the fold.”
“De boss has a child?” Grim exclaimed. “I didn’t know dat!”
“My name is Raven,” the young witch introduced herself before pointing to the even more youthful wizard, “and this is my… stepbrother, Tim.”
Grim somehow managed to rotate his skull so that it faced the two youthful magicians. “A pleasure to meet you, Miss Black. Mr. Black… err… Junior.”
“GREETINGS, RAVEN AND TIM BLACK,” Bill offered. “ARE YOU ALSO A DEATH, TIM?”
“Umm… I don’t think so,” the Hunter scion stated unsurely.
“Well, you boys can help Grim pull himself together. Raven and I have girl stuff to talk about,” Teleute informed her colleagues.
The purple-haired girl looked at the other gothic woman appraisingly. “We do?” she asked.
“We do,” Teleute nodded firmly. “I’m sure that you have questions that you’d like to ask—I know that I do. Not the least of which is why Hades left a large gift basket on my doorstep, along with a card begging me to never leave your dad in charge again.”
A/N: As promised, here’s the 8,400-word followup to The Great Blackout.
Look out for the two-part conclusion and—possibly—the epilogue to be posted soon.
A few omakes and suggestions were implemented in this chapter, namely Death Convention by Ben Sheahan, the tornado/Nuni addition by Luinlothana, and By Dawn’s Early Light by Chris Hill.
Many thanks to Chris for proofreading this chapter, and to all the CaerAzkaban group members whose suggestions appear in this update.
Thank you for your interest, and please remember to review.